


Such Sweet Sorrow

by princessdi



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Angst, Angst and Drama, Bittersweet Ending, Divorce, Drama, F/M, Historical Hetalia, Historical References, Implied Relationships, Implied/Referenced Cheating, Mentioned France (Hetalia), Mentioned Prussia (Hetalia), Minor Hungary/Prussia (Hetalia), Post-World War I, Relationship Study, Tension, Unhealthy Relationships
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-07
Updated: 2020-04-07
Packaged: 2021-03-02 01:28:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,409
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23506867
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/princessdi/pseuds/princessdi
Summary: With their divorce finalized, Hungary comes over to pack up the last of her belongings. Emotions run hot between Austria and her, resulting in an explosion of resentment and upset.
Relationships: Austria/Hungary (Hetalia)
Comments: 5
Kudos: 9





	Such Sweet Sorrow

**Author's Note:**

> This is a story I've been meaning to write for about a month now, but wanted to follow more creative endeavors first. I saw that it was Historical Hetalia week on tumblr and decided I needed to write this, loosely fitting the today's prompt of 'up in flames'. I hope you enjoy! -Suzanne/princessdi

_Vienna, November 1918._

Home was a prison.

At least, so it felt as long as Erzsébet was there. Roderich could feel her presence throughout, how every footstep she took ricocheted throughout his mind. His discomfort irritated him. Why should he be made to feel this way in his own home? _She_ had decided to leave _him._ She should be the one grappling with all these unpleasant emotions, unable to look her ex in the eye.

He watched her. She moved with such ease and purpose, swooping up her meager possessions and packing them in boxes. Centuries of a life together, all fitting neatly in cardboard. He pondered that, deciding there was a metaphor in there for their ill-fated match.

Stretching, Erzsébet turned and faced him. A flicker of disapproval crossed through her eyes. He wasn’t meant to catch it, and yet, he did. “You don’t have to stand around, watching me. I’m not going to steal anything, Roderich.” She hoisted up three boxes stacked upon each other.

Roderich took the third box, ignoring her jab. “I told you, I’m here to help you. I don’t want you lugging these around all by yourself. You could get hurt.” He paused, scowling at what he just said. “Though, your stubbornness likely makes you blind again.”

She gritted her teeth, exhaling loudly through her nose. “I’m fully capable of handling things on my own.” She walked out of the room, counting backwards in her mind to calm down.

“You are, or at least that’s what you keep telling me.”

Erzsébet put her boxes down with the rest of what was packed in the foyer. She refused to face him, knowing the sight of his smugness would set her off. “Are we still talking about the same thing?”

“Do you wish to be?”

She could visualize how he was looking at her. A taunting gleam in his eyes, begging her forward to escalate, another barb on his tongue. How tempting it was, to follow the steps of their familiar waltz. “I wish to be home as soon as possible.” She hurried up the stairs, up to their old bedroom. She rolled her eyes, hearing him following her up. As of late, all he did was chase after her. It had been what she wanted for so many years. Now, having it, she found it pathetic.

Once in the doorway, she stopped. Coming back in here again felt like a violation. She was tempted to tell him to keep the dresses, keep the perfumes and jewels, if it meant she wouldn’t be forced to enter. But he was standing right behind her and didn’t want him to perceive the slightest bit of hesitation or weakness within her. She forced one foot in front of the other, saying what she had long thought. “This always felt more like your room than ours. It rarely felt welcoming.”

Roderich leaned against the doorframe, arms crossed. “Ah, but you used to have such fun here.” Bitterness seeped through every word. He couldn’t help himself. The better half of him, the side who’d worked so hard to prevent this outcome, begged him to shut up. He ignored it. This was release, this was the best he’d felt in months as he’d watched their marriage and empire implode. “How many times did you whisk your lover up here? The room felt enough like yours for you to never hesitate in defiling our bed.”

Her hand hovered over a group of hangers. Erzsébet knew what he was doing, knew what he wanted. She told herself she didn’t want it to come to this, but she knew it was a lie. Why come when he was home, why not accept his offer of packing while he was out? She wanted this as much as he. “Would you rather me languish in our marital bed, unsatisfied?” She tossed him a cold glance over her shoulder before returning her attention to the folding of clothes. “Someone had to fulfill your spousal duties. It’s not my fault your enemy is so ravishing _._ ”

“Languished, ridiculous. As if you ever suffered because of me.” He shook his head, scowling. “How foolish of me, taking you in and expecting to make a lady out of a whore.” He dramatically rested a hand against his chest. “Pity the poor man who didn’t listen to Francis. That damn gossip knows everything.”

She had ceased properly folding her clothes, instead she scrunched them up and threw them into a suitcase. “You really put that much value in the word of a man who thinks he knows everything but knows nothing over me? Typical, birds of a feather.” Realizing what she was doing, she worked to smooth the wrinkles out. No point in ruining such gorgeous dresses over a pointless tiff. “But, if you knew all in advance, then there is no reason to pity you. You’ve brought all this misfortune upon yourself.” Her voice lilted up with a songlike quality. “Bold of an expert in bedroom diplomacy to throw accusations of whorishness around.”

She watched his reaction through the mirror. His eyes narrowed, his hands balled to fists. Her words had hit their mark. Pride filled her, making her oblivious to his next strike. “My biggest mistake was rescuing you from the Turks.” They made eye contact through the vanity. As he spoke, she watched him fill up with unbridled contempt. “Damn Antonio, making me pity you out of a shared religion and wanting to drive them out of the continent completely. I should’ve left you, let fate decide where you wound up.”

Erzsébet remained frozen. Her mind processed over what he had dared to say to her. Her anger could no longer be contained. “So that’s what you would change if we could redo everything? That’s your only regret?” Her words shook. She closed her eyes, trying to regain control of her senses. “You only pretended to change to avoid this outcome sooner. Silly me, I almost thought you cared.”

If he had been in control of himself, he would’ve denied this charge. Roderich was in too deep. His upset felt justified, as if it were healing. The truth was inconsequential now. But lying, how good that would make this all feel. “Why else would I have bothered? I see now that the whole ruse was a waste.” He was walking the path of self-destruction and couldn’t veer off course.

Her fury was slow in fully rising. He noticed how it bubbled beneath the surface of her eyes. Roderich desperately wanted it to erupt – for it to cause her to feel something, _anything,_ towards him. “I should’ve known better, both at the start and at the end. My faith in you has always been misplaced.” She chuckled grimly. “I should’ve relented to him earlier than I had. I wasted so much time on you.”

The part of his mind that remained clear-eyed begged him to stop; to tell her that her faith hadn’t been for nothing; that, all too late, he loved her. He sneered at her mentioning him. “Of course! How had I not put it together sooner! _That’s_ what this is all about. You’re going through with this to please him.” He could imagine the arrogant joy Gilbert was taking in this whole affair, at how he’d outmaneuvered Roderich once again in affairs of the heart. Rage consumed him fully. This would require vengeance that would devastate them both.

He was snapped out of his madness by her yelling. It contained such primal, unbridled loathing that it filled the room and cleared his mind. A bottle of perfume was flung at his head, barely missing, and crashed against the wall behind him. He accepted the spray of it over his face and clothes; he accepted the cut of glass shards across his back and shoulders; he accepted that this is the outcome he had caused. He forced himself to look in her eyes and saw what he expected. They held her true feelings for him, for the centuries of animosity towards him and his rulers. For the first time, it didn’t bother him.

Her body was trembling, filled with such adrenaline. “How dare you.” Her hand grabbed another bottle, enjoying how he flinched. “I would’ve thought you were capable of more intelligence, but I misjudged how your ego blinds you to all reason. Do you think I only do things to please you or him, that you are the twin poles my life revolves around? Is that how low your opinion is of me, Roderich?” Hungary was shouting, she couldn’t control herself any longer. “Everything I’ve done has been for me and my people! To make our lives better! Both of you are so goddamn selfish to think that my heart is like Silesia, a possession to be invaded and seized by the victor! My heart belongs to Budapest, to my people, to their whims and desires. Who are you to them? Nothing, nothing but the embodiment of what we’ve been captive to for the last four hundred years.”

Her breathing was ragged. Austria nervously reached a hand out towards her. “Erzsébet, I-” She slapped his hand away. He didn’t know if she’d gotten stronger or if he’d gotten weaker.

“Don’t say a word to me, I’m not finished. I’m leaving you for them, for what they’ve always wanted. And for myself, so don’t get any more conceited ideas. This is for me. This is what I’ve wanted since the fourteenth century. To finally be in control of my own destiny, no one to boss me around or tell me to be a lady or force me to bend to their will. You certainly could never offer me that, do you think he can?” She scoffed, turning her back on him in disgust. “Are you two the only independent pieces on the board or did you forget what the queen is capable of again?”

Her words stung. They hurt more than any wound he’d received prior. Thinking rationally, he couldn’t deny the validity of what she said. There were no arguments against it. Roderich bowed his head. “I apologize for my childishness. This hasn’t been easy on me. I’ve been lashing out without meaning what I say, forgive me.” He swallowed his pride. “Please, I don’t want things to end this way.”

The time for apologizing had passed. She returned to throwing her belongings in boxes. “Nor did I. This wasn’t meant to be so personal against you. But, well, we never did get along. Only fitting this is how it should go.” There was a note of sadness in her words. She shook her head, refusing to dwell. “I’m sorry for my harshness, but I need you to understand I meant every word.”

“I know. Here, allow me.” Without any complaints, she allowed him to take over the folding. They continued in silence until everything was stored neatly. Everything, that is, except for her jewels.

Erzsébet cautiously opened the case containing them. “Take back whatever you gave me. I don’t mind.” It didn’t feel right keeping what he so generously gave. Especially considering how much they were worth. It would feel too greedy of her.

“They’re yours, they were all gifts. I don’t want them.” She opened her mouth to protest. “Erzsébet, no. I refuse to. Take them with you.” He gently pushed them towards her. “You don’t have to wear them, but at least keep them to sell if you need money.” He smiled slightly, trying to put her at ease. She packed them away securely, not wanting any harm to come to the gems or wood.

For the first time in two hundred years, the room was utterly devoid of any traces of her. Roderich tried to find the positives in it – more closet space! More room to stretch out on the bed! – but found all the reasons uncompelling. He missed her already.

“Strange, it looks like the day you moved me in here.” The sight stirred something within her. These last few years with him had been lovely. They had finally learnt how to enjoy each other’s company, to laugh at each other’s jokes, to appreciate the other for who they were. She didn’t doubt that she had made the right decision, but wished the good times had only begun sooner when they would’ve mattered more.

“I was thinking the same thing.” Roderich smiled, a bittersweet feeling claiming its hold to his heart. “Come on, you’ve got a long journey ahead of you. Don’t let the ghosts of the pasts keep you here.” It was as much advice for her as it was for himself.

With the help of one of the remaining servants, they lugged everything into her car. How easily centuries filled into the trunk. Once done, they stood awkwardly, trying and failing to find the right words to say.

Austria straightened his back. He could do his mourning in private. Let her last images of him be similar to the man she had grown to know – confident, capable, and with a warmth reserved for her. He remembered the peaceful little moments they shared, when getting along was both difficult and natural. A genuine smile spread across his face. “Please know that, despite what’s changed, I will always be here for you and cheering you on. I _truly_ want the best for you, Erzsébet, in everything. There are no bad feelings on my end.”

To his surprise, she kissed him so light that he could’ve mistaken it for the breeze. His heart ached, knowing that to be the last time. “Thank you, but I want to be alone for now. I need time to myself.” She squeezed his hand, which he hadn’t realized she had been holding. “Perhaps in another life, in another time, things could’ve worked out differently for us. I wish they had. Despite your best efforts, you’re a good man.”

There was so much he wanted to say, that he felt it imperative to tell her. He couldn’t hold her here forever, regardless of his selfish desires. “Perhaps we could. In the next life, we’ll have to try that.” He swallowed down the lump of emotion forming in his throat and kissed her cheek. _“Viszontlátásra,_ Erzsébet.”

_“Auf Wiedersehen,_ Roderich.” He watched her climb into the car, watched her drive off into the horizon. She had left him, after so many years of threatening to, taking his heart with her.


End file.
